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Correction/piano exam
Message from icyy posted on 31-08-2011 at 16:49:56 (D | E | F)
Hello,
Here is my writing
Hope youcan won't mind correcting my grammar mistakes!!
Thank you very much for your help.
I passed the grade 8 exam of piano.
And i joined the spanish course in my leisure time.
After taking the DSE exam,i will continue to study spanish.
I participated in voluntary work twice.They were meaningful.
Everytime when i think about the donation can help those people in need,
i know what i 've done is worthy.From the work,i know that the society is built by everyone, so we should be responsible to the society.
Last year,I've won a first-runner up in a territory-wide history competition.
I learnt a lot from it, for example,teamwork,analyse technique,work distribution.
It greatly helps on my future career.And It was a great experience for me working with others.I really enjoyed the process.
I want to be a nurse.When i was about 9 years old,i watched a TV programme which was deeply impressed me.It's held by a charity organization.It told that many people in the world was in poverty,suffered from illness but didn't have money to heal it while many people in the world was indulging in luxury.The scene convulsed me.That's the first time of me to relize that i am the lucky one.So i really want to help them.I want to join the Médecins Sans Frontières, travel around the world to help poor people.Because of this,i will try my best to study.
I will also take the AFA course to learn some basic technique to help people.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 31-08-2011 19:13
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Modifié par lucile83 le 05-09-2011 15:41
English Only forum
Message from icyy posted on 31-08-2011 at 16:49:56 (D | E | F)
Hello,
Here is my writing
Hope you
Thank you very much for your help.
I passed the grade 8 exam of piano.
And i joined the spanish course in my leisure time.
After taking the DSE exam,i will continue to study spanish.
I participated in voluntary work twice.They were meaningful.
Everytime when i think about the donation can help those people in need,
i know what i 've done is worthy.From the work,i know that the society is built by everyone, so we should be responsible to the society.
Last year,I've won a first-runner up in a territory-wide history competition.
I learnt a lot from it, for example,teamwork,analyse technique,work distribution.
It greatly helps on my future career.And It was a great experience for me working with others.I really enjoyed the process.
I want to be a nurse.When i was about 9 years old,i watched a TV programme which was deeply impressed me.It's held by a charity organization.It told that many people in the world was in poverty,suffered from illness but didn't have money to heal it while many people in the world was indulging in luxury.The scene convulsed me.That's the first time of me to relize that i am the lucky one.So i really want to help them.I want to join the Médecins Sans Frontières, travel around the world to help poor people.Because of this,i will try my best to study.
I will also take the AFA course to learn some basic technique to help people.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 31-08-2011 19:13
-------------------
Modifié par lucile83 le 05-09-2011 15:41
English Only forum
Re: Correction/piano exam from headway, posted on 31-08-2011 at 17:05:52 (D | E)
Hi,
Here are a few spelling mistakes:
"Here is my writting
Hope you can correct my grammar mistake!!
thanks!!!
I passed the grade 8 exam of piano.
And i joined the spanish course in my leisure time.
After taking the DSE exam,i will continue to study spanish.
I participated in voluntary work twice.They were meaningful.
Everytime when i think about the donation can help those people in need,
i know what i 've done is worthy.From the work,i know that the society is built by everyone, so we should be responsible to the society.
Last year,I've won a first-runner up in a territory-wide history competition.
I learnt a lot from it, for example,teamwork,analyse technique,work distribution.
It greatly helps on my future career.And It was a great experience for me working with others.I really enjoyed the process.
I want to be a nurse.When i was about 9 years old,i watched a TV programme which was deeply impressed me.It's held by a charity organization.It told that many people in the world was in poverty,suffered from illness but didn't have money to heal it while many people in the world was indulging in luxury.The scene convulsed me.That's the first time of me to relize that i am the lucky one.So i really want to help them.I want to join the Médecins Sans Frontières, travel around the world to help poor people.Because of this,i will try my best to study.
I will also take the AFA course to learn some basic technique to help people."
I am now going to check your grammar and will post later.
Cheers!
Re: Correction/piano exam from icyy, posted on 01-09-2011 at 13:15:26 (D | E)
Thank you so much!
waiting to receive your comment
Re: Correction/piano exam from notrepere, posted on 01-09-2011 at 17:24:14 (D | E)
HelloI passed the grade 8 exam of piano (1).
And I joined (2) the Spanish course in my leisure time.
After taking the DSE exam, I will continue to study Spanish.
I participated in voluntary work twice. They were (3) meaningful.
Everytime (4) when I think about [mot manquant: comment] the donation can help those people in need,
I know what I've done is worthy. From the work, I know that the society is built by everyone, so we should be responsible to the society.
Last year, I've (5) won a first runner-up in a territory-wide history competition.
I learnt a lot from it, for example, teamwork, analyse technique
, work distribution.It greatly helps on my future career. And It was a great experience for my working with others. I really enjoyed the process.
I want to be a nurse. When I was about 9 years old, I watched a TV programme which was deeply impressed me. It's (5) held by a charity organization. It told (2) that many people in the world was (6) in poverty and suffered from illness but didn't have money to heal it while many people in the world was (6) indulging in luxury. The scene convulsed me. That's (5) the first time
I will also take the AFA course to learn some basic techniques to help people.
(1) piano exam
(2) Another verb
(3) Singular: It...
(4) Two words
(5) verb tense to review
(6) plural
(7) spelling and verb tense
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Modifié par notrepere le 04-09-2011 19:33
Sorry, I hadn't noticed that you don't speak French. You should only post on the "English Only" forum if you only want a response in English
Re: Correction/piano exam from icyy, posted on 04-09-2011 at 17:17:13 (D | E)
I'm sorry
I don't know what you talked about
Re: Correction/piano exam from sherry48, posted on 05-09-2011 at 15:16:22 (D | E)
Hello icyy.
I have just a few minor things to add to notrepere's good suggestions.
Instead of voluntary work, the usual term is volunteer work, and for worthy, it is worthwhile.
In this phrase, 'didn't have money to heal it', I think you can find a better word than heal.
I'm also not sure what you mean by analyse technique...technical analysis? or how to analyze
technique? (I think analyse 
)In this sentence...'I want to join the Médecins Sans Frontières, travel...'it would be better to write and travel.
Sherry
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